Articles & Notes — August 20, 2017 at 2:04 pm

Why you should and shouldn’t see Baywatch (2017)

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So, the infamous “Baywatch” TV series with David Hasselhoff were brought back to life, with a new R-rated feature film, starring Dwayne Johnson, Zac Efron and others.

The $69-million budget film didn’t do so well in the domestic box office, according to Box Office Mojo, but gathered over $175 million worldwide.

“Baywatch” is of course not a serious film, just something to get you going during the summer.

So here are your top three reasons to check the film out:

WOMEN
Who’d want to see lifeguards saving people on the beach unless we have hot, bikini wearing babes (both as lifeguards and not)? Well, “Baywatch” is on the level in this department.

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It should be noted that there’s great variety too: Priyanka Chopra (Victoria Leeds) is Indian, Alexandra Daddario (Summer Quinn) is a brunette, Kelly Rohrbach (CJ Parker) is blonde, and Ilfenesh Hadera (Stephanie Holden) is of Ethiopian (father) and European-American (mother) descent, as IMDb says. You could say we’re lacking an Asian beauty, but there’s more than enough.

EXPECTED CAMEOS
Obviously, very few people expected to see a “Baywatch” remake without David Hasselhoff, and he’s here. He’s older, but he’s here. Listed as “the mentor” he even has a few lines to say to Dwayne Johnson. All hail the Hoff! And not just him! Pamela Anderson also has a cameo!

ZAC EFRON
Believe it or not, Zac Efron literally steals almost every scene he’s in. That includes scenes with hot women as well. The reason for that is simple – Efron’s character (Matt Brody) always seems to get into either trouble or funny situations (he gets to dress as a woman, and touch a dead man’s balls) throughout the film. The one in the morgue has to be seen to be believed. Compared to Dwayne Johnson, Efron looks more alive, fresh and funny.

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“Baywatch” of course isn’t without flaws, and considering that the original TV series had its fans, BZFilm also lists the reasons, why you can easily skip the remake:

THE CAMEOS
Yes, both David Hasselhoff and Pamela Anderson make cameo appearances in the film. But… they are so out of place. Literally. Hasselhoff’s character first appears as a ghost, and delivers a meaningless dialogue. Later, he talks to himself (to Dwayne Johnson), they call each other “Mitch” and discuss who’s going to be in the sequel. This spoof wasn’t funny. As for Pamela Anderson, this is even worse. Her cameo is totally ruined. She’s on the screen for a minute or so, has no lines, and her face is barely seen. What a waste.

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LANGUAGE, NUDITY, ETC…
The TV Baywatch was family friendly. Yes, there were hot women in tight swimsuits, but nothing out of ordinary. The remake has more “adult stuff”, which includes bad language, jokes below the belt, nudity and so on. Pamela Anderson, for example, didn’t feel exactly thriller with this, judging from the interviews. Ah well, movies have to adjust to modern audiences.

MITCH BUCHANNON, THE SUPERHERO
First off, we all know why Dwayne Johnson was cast as Mitch Buchannon. He’s the superstar, he puts asses in seats, he sells tickets. Now, the not-so-good thing is that Johnson doesn’t look like… Mitch Buchannon, the lifeguard. He looks too big, and just doesn’t strike you as a lifeguard. He looks more like an escaped convict or a former SWAT veteran, or even a former wrestler…. not a lifeguard.

Compared to him, David Hasselhoff looked the part much better. Hasselhoff’s Buchannon was your average joe, who just happened to work as a lifeguard, and be pretty good at it. Considering that “Baywatch remake” was about re-inventing the whole story, let’s assume Johnson’s Buchannon was supposed to be different. During the entire movie, he looks indestructible… except for when he’s fired. We see him being miserable, working in a store, and you just feel sorry for him. Seems like Buchannon was only good at one thing, being a lifeguard. This was a letdown for Johnson’s character.

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