Articles & Notes, Ideas & Personal creations — October 24, 2011 at 6:16 pm

Epic Azerbaijani movie: National Leader vs the Soviet Monster

Okay, I was doing some work on my photo website today, and this really crazy idea came up to me, so I decided to make a post on it.

The idea is basically a film idea, that could have been shot in Azerbaijan. Sadly, no one will ever do it, even if this post will be seen by the right people, but I’ll get to that later. now, let’s get to the idea itself.

Little intro: In Baku (capital of Azerbaijan) we, of course, got lots of monuments. Some are really beautiful, others are ugly, some are even scary. This particular monument on the pictures below falls into “ugly” and “scary” categories.

This is a monument to “the worker” who breaks the chains, and sets himself free (don’t mind the watermark, I had tough time shooting him under heavy rain).

This monument is what was left to us, when Soviet Union collapsed, so I call him “the Soviet Monster”. Anyway, from this point of view, he looks scary, yet like a positive character. Well, not this time:)

Story: Somewhere near the monument, in one of the old houses lives this old woman, who seems to be some sort of a witch, and since she was born in Soviet Russia, she still is upset by the collapse of USSR. So, one day, she decides to take revenge…using the “Soviet Monster”.

And, one rainy day, she goes out, comes up close to the “Monster”, and starts to exorcise. As a result, a sudden lightning comes from the skies right into the “Soviet Monster”, and then another one hits the old woman. She drops dead… while the monster…STARTS TO MOVE…

From there on – Stone “Soviet Monster” turns into a living statue, that moves around and, well, wreaks havoc. I am thinking, the monster would have had Steven Seagal’s attitude, young Dolph Lundgren’s look, Nathan Jones’ power, and the rage of Jean-Claude Van Damme – in other words, this stone dude would be seemingly indestructible.

So, the city is in panic already, as the “Soviet Monster” moves deeper into the city, crushing everything in his path, and its up to our heroes (insert some people here, probably some youngsters) to save their capital from the “Soviet Monster”.

Story 2: Goes same as the first, only now, the “Soviet Monster” has a clear goal – to destroy the “heart” of Baku – Icheri Sheher (ancient inner city near Baku bay).

And, our heroes (again, insert some names here) figure out a plan – since they’re unable to stop the stone giant themselves, they need someone bigger, someone who would stand his ground against Soviet evil…and that someone is…Azerbaijan’s national leader, Heydar Aliyev…to be exact, his statue, that’s standing in the center of Baku (see pictures below).

Now, our kids have to reanimate the statue, and help Aliyev reach the Icheri Sheher, before the “Soviet Monster” crushes it into pieces. Aliyev manages to reach there in time (thanks to the help of local authorities), and there is of course a big showdown: the Leader of Azerbaijani nation standing face to face with the Evil from the past, “Soviet Monster”…

Anyway, some would of course say that I have one heck of a wild imagination, but this actually could be done.

I thought of stop-motion animation, like in those old Hollywood horror and sci-fi movies of the 50’s. Who said Azerbaijan can’t make movies? Just got to have the right idea. This idea is also quite patriotic, and a would be fun to watch as well…



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