REVIEWS: Action & Thrillers — December 7, 2012 at 12:55 am

REVIEW: Meltdown (2009)

Whenever a movie pops up, that stars veteran actors Robert Z’Dar and Joe Estevez, it almost automatically means it is a B-movie.

In a lot of cases, this means a bad b-movie, however sometimes a flick with Estevez and Z’Dar can be put into a “so bad, its good” category. “Meltdown” here, sadly does not fit into it.

The story is as cliche as it can be. Government agent John Thomas (Christopher J. Martin), who looks like a hero from old Russian fairy tales, is tasked to enter a crime organization, and capture their leader, a crime lord named Dragon (Vernon Zaucha).

First, however, Thomas stumbles on Dragon’s right-hand man Crazy Eddie (Robert Z’Dar), who takes Thomas under his wing.

Agent Winslow (Joe Estevez) is the one who recommends Thomas for the job, however later he’s instructed to get rid of him.

Even considering how much of a cult actors are Z’Dar and Estevez, this particular film is one of their worst joint projects. This is not really their fault though.

In 2009-2010 Z’Dar had some sort of illness, and he rapidly started going out of shape, physically. In “Meltdown”, Z’Dar looks so bad, it actually affects his acting. He looks like having the “biggest face on the planet”, rather than “biggest jaw in Hollywood”, as he’s been called throughout his career.

Thankfully, the former “Maniac Cop” managed to get himself out of this mess, losing some 30 lbs in 2011, and now he’s back in shape, and of course busy doing independent movies again.

Estevez doesn’t have much to do here, handling a rather bleak, forgettable part as a double-crossing government agent.

The real eye candy here is Andrea Tice – another government agent that our hero falls in love with. Tice is as gorgeous as a woman can be, and it is really a shame that “Meltdown” was her only acting job. It makes one wonder, if after seeing the end result, Tice decided to stop doing movies altogether.

Christopher J. Martin not only plays the leading part here as undercover agent Thomas, he’s also the director, composer, and responsible for writing “Meltdown”.

Briefly speaking, the film doesn’t have much to offer, even to those with low demands for a b-movie. Take a look at the cover – a badly photoshopped piece tries to present “Meltdown” as an action film, whether there’s pretty much nothing in the film what the cover wants you to believe.

The dialogue is laughable, the acting is so wooden at times, it starts to irritate quite fast, and the fighting scenes are worse than in those chop-socky martial arts movies.

The special effects are even worse, as you see a person getting shot, and grabbing his clean white shirt, as if there was a gun wound.

Overall, “Meltdown” is a letdown – the film is pretty bad even for a b-movie. There’s very little action, Christopher J. Martin is not a great actor by any possible stretch, and the film’s story is as cliche as it can be.

BZFILM SCALE: 2/10

 



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