I never really liked “medieval” type films. Today they’re not bankable, and most of the time they suck, to be honest. And here we have “In the Name of the King 2” starring Dolph Lundgren, and directed by Uwe Boll… So, take a wild guess: does the film suck? Or should I say, how much does the film suck?
The story is…well, kind of mixed. We have Granger (Lundgren), an ex Special Forces guy, who teaches karate to kids in his small dojo.
We don’t get a chance to see him do anything else, as within 10 minutes of the beginning of the movie Granger gets thrown back to medieval times, where he has to fulfill an ancient prophecy. Even after watching the whole film, I cannot remember what this “ancient prophecy” thing was about… that’s gotta mean something.
Anyway, after Granger gets captured by King’s guards, and kicked around a little, the King himself (Lochlyn Munro) tells him a touching story about this prophecy, and that he’s a Chosen One.
And, the Chosen One has a mission to accomplish: to infiltrate an “evil kingdom”, and to kill some old witch. Just to make sure he gets the job done, Granger gets to bang a cute medieval doctor (Natassia Malthe) and then rushes to accomplish king’s task, and hopefully try to find a way to return back to his time.
The film is full of nonsense. IMDB states that Dolph Lundgren “reluctantly accepted the part in the movie, after rejecting Uwe Boll’s offer once”, and it shows. Lundgren doesn’t seem to care at all, he’s laid back throughout the whole film, and he doesn’t really get into any serious action either (a couple of pathetic fights don’t count).
I admit that I don’t feel sorry for him, since you have to be Dolph Lundgren to appear in this kind of movie, and then go straight to theaters all over the world in “Expendables 2”. Let’s hope Dolph’s career won’t be damaged too much with this Uwe Boll masterpiece.
Another known actor here who is not so lucky is Lochlyn Munro. He looks so pathetic as the King, trying not to burst into laughs while delivering his lines, and there’s also a wig that he’s wearing… Sorry, “my Lord”, you look more like a joker than a king.
Towards the end of the film, our medieval tale turns into a syfy channel “creature feature” with a dragon appearing out of nowhere. While the CGI dragon looks fine (fine doesn’t mean good, it means I’ve seen a lot worse), it surely doesn’t save the film.
I know that a lot of people bash Uwe Boll’s films even before they actually see them. I prefer watching first, and I do like some of his movies (Tunnel Rats, Rampage, Farcry), but “In the Name of the King 2” is a letdown for Boll.
You can watch this only:
– If you are a die hard Dolph Lundgren fan
– If you want to see Lundgren battling the CGI dragon
– If you want to see Lochlyn Munro in a wig
– If you simply love Uwe Boll and bad movies
Otherwise, you might as well skip the film, and simply settle for a trailer below.
BZFILM SCALE: 2/10
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